February 2012
18 posts
I am so good at finishing journals on significant...
I finished my first journal on my last day of rehab.
I finished this journal on the one year anniversary of my first day of rehab.
Journal number three, when will I finish you?
2 tags
Women need to stop slut-shaming other women.
Jess: if ur pockets are longer than ur pants, u kno there is a problem
Me: Says who?
Jess: says the people who dont want too see other peoples ass hanging out the back of their pants hahaha i dont care how good u look there is no reason so show the bottom of ur preppy little ass cheeks to the world... slutty bitches hahaha
Me: Hmmm Why do girls just LOVE to shame other girls? It's either "look at the shorts on that slut" or "look at the sweater on that prude." Always attacking, always shaming. There is no "right" skin to cloth ratio. There is nothing immoral about skin, and there is nothing wrong with covering up either. Every girl has a right to do with her body what she will and she should never have to feel ashamed of it. What's really sad is when it's other girls perpetuating the cycle of slut-shaming.
Jess: its not slutt shaming if she is clearly disrespecting herself and therefore the name of all other women, not just by what she is wearing, but how she is acting a portaying herself to society. a woman should have pride in how she looks and shouldnt be acting like drunk slut if that is not how she wanted other people to see her. its nothing against the lack of clothing, im a nude model for my schools art club, whats gets me is the attitude behind it and the fact that it isnt even warm enough for it and she is probably going to get a terrible cold.
Me: No, actually it IS slut-shaming. Very much so. And by calling other girls sluts for the way they act at parties or the way they dress or the number of people they sleep with, you're doing an injustice to women everywhere by furthering this disgusting idea that women aren't allowed to express sexuality. Just because it's not the way you choose to express yourself doesn't make it wrong and certainly does not give you the right to shame another person for it.
Emily: You are right, there is nothing immoral about choosing to show (or not show) as much or little skin as you may like. That's her body and her decision. But to purposefully chose to wear things that she is (hopefully) fully aware will cause controversy or at least draw attention to her body, she has to be able to handle the negative feedback that society will inevitable respond with. It's not about how people SHOULD respond. If we all focused on how problems should be dealt with and idealistic bullshit, the world would be perfect and there would be no issues. But that's not it works. Instead it's more how they DO respond. People have hurtful opinions, people voice them. It sucks, but they should be prepared to deal with it. They are obviously big girls, they should be able to handle the attention if they are provoking it.
Me: Yes, she should recognize that society will most likely frown upon her. But as women, we should educate ourselves and realize that there is nothing productive about calling other women sluts. And so that's why when I hear a disrespectful comment and a comment that is absolutely not okay, I will call people out on it and I will educate them as to why it isn't okay. Because that is how change happens, through people speaking out against injustice wherever they can. To say "oh well society is going to frown upon this anyway so I might as well continue calling girls sluts and joking around about this" is, to be quite frank, an ignorant and harmful way to act.
Jess: woman are perfectly allowed to express their sexuality but there is a line between expressing who u are and just being trashy and our society is bluring that line further and further and by woman acting the way they do they get themselves into a bad view in the eyes of society. its not woman saying things about other women that creates the problem, although it is a part of it, and its not that i have a problem with people exposing their body in a public manner, again it is the attitude behind it that matters and if someone is dressing like that and acting the way that young woman was acting then she may not be a slut but she is certainly not someone with class.
Emily: I guess I just don't see the difference between thinking differently and poorly of a girl because of the way she dresses than I do criticizing a man for the way that he dresses. If we can ridicule guys for wearing pants that are belted at their knees, we can pass judgement on a girl for wearing a shirt that doesn't cover her nipple.
Me: But who are you to decide what is "trashy"? What does "trashy" even mean? It doesn't mean anything. It's a derogatory term used against women who choose to be more sexual than other women. And there is NOTHING wrong with any degree of sexual expression. And what is this idea of "class" as well? All these words, all these negative words. I don't understand the need for them. And I don't condone talking badly about men either, so I don't really understand the relevance of that. And I don't believe that we should be passing judgment on women who show their nipples either, but the decency of breast exposure is a completely different debate.But all I am saying is that America is very uncomfortable with the expression of sexuality. And everything that you two are saying right now is perpetuating that. That's the point. I do suggest that you both just look into "slut-shaming" and things of that nature. There are plenty of feminism books out there that could really help you understand the concepts that I'm trying to express to you.
Cliff: "She may not be a slut but she's definitely wearing a sluts uniform". Thanks Dave Chappelle.
Emily: I know what slut shaming is. I'm not ignorant to how cruel women can be treated and how victims of terrible crimes such as rape can be belittled and disregarded because "they were asking for it". It's disgusting. I understand the points and arguments you are making and I even agree with most of your points. I guess what I'm trying to stress is that I pass judgement on people for myriads of things, as I am certain you do. However, I don't feel that disagreeing with someones taste in clothes and voicing that concern is the same as saying "that girl deserved to be raped". It's not about them blatantly expressing their sexuality, it's just that I don't necessarily care for how the way they are choosing to express it. Every woman has the right to dress how they want to dress, fuck how they want to fuck, but I have the right to not approve of it.
Me: That term "slut" drives me up a wall. Why is it such a bad thing for a woman to freely express her sexuality regardless of what a religion or traditional values have told her? There's nothing wrong with having sex with a lot of people. There's nothing wrong with having sex with no people. Sexuality is beautiful because there are so many facets and so many spectrums and everyone is different, but hardly anyone can see it because everyone's so afraid to show it because everyone else shames them for it. I'll stop taking over your status now, but just think about it, some food for thought. Just really think if you want to be a part of the cycle that keeps women (and everyone, really) locked into sexual scripts, or if you'd prefer to break that cycle... And yes, Emily, you have a right not to approve of it. Just as conservatives have a right to disapprove of homosexuality. But that doesn't make it right to call someone a "faggot" because you disapprove of it.
Emily: It doesn't make it right, it just means I have the right. There is a difference.
Me: You do. And I have the right to tell someone who calls homosexuals "faggots" exactly why that's wrong. Just like I am telling you why the term "slut" is wrong...
So breaking up with people is awkward as fuck.
Even though we only went on like two dates so it’s not that big of a deal. Still.
How to deal with being called out
youarenotyou:
Don’t tone police. It is NOT your right to dictate how someone should react to their oppression.
Don’t demand a detailed explanation.* You’re basically asking the person to justify their call out. It’s exhausting, many resources are available, and often this is just a way to try and derail, start an argument, or discredit the other person.
Don’t ...
My space, My rules: The fact that I refuse to... →
upndoincircles:
wolfenisa:
upndoincircles:
(other than my right ear)
is making the possibility of piercing my nipples and/or genitalia much more plausible.
BUT WHY AM I EVEN CONSIDERING THIS!!!?????
D:
I agree, why? Why consider this? You dont need to be piercing yer…
Well I don’t know what they mean for other people, but they definitely fall into a sort of artistic...
The fact that I refuse to pierce my face
wolfenisa:
upndoincircles:
(other than my right ear)
is making the possibility of piercing my nipples and/or genitalia much more plausible.
BUT WHY AM I EVEN CONSIDERING THIS!!!?????
D:
I agree, why? Why consider this? You dont need to be piercing yer body parts!
But but but! I like piercings. A lot. And I’m slowly running out of places to pierce. And so these are my options!
...
The fact that I refuse to pierce my face
(other than my right ear)
is making the possibility of piercing my nipples and/or genitalia much more plausible.
BUT WHY AM I EVEN CONSIDERING THIS!!!?????
D:
Reblog this if you live in Washington state
aboyinastitch:
nothingislostintheend:
withthefoxes:
oliviaonfire:
Seattle, fuck yeah
253
360
when i say 2-0, you say-nah you know the rest ;D
My Father
Is a white man. He makes a six figure salary, is a home-owner, is middle aged. He is very much a man of privilege. However, he’s very politically liberal, even when it comes to economic issues.
So he emailed me today informing me of the Susan G. Komen Foundation’s decision to pull funding from Planned Parenthood (even though I already knew about it). A little bit later he sent me this...
January 2012
96 posts
Words.
hellomuses:
